Did you search for deep questions to reconnect with your partner? Do you even remember what it is like to flirt and have butterflies in your stomach?

You might feel like things are okay in your relationship but…. something still feels amiss.

You are unsure if you are still attracted to this partner. I mean, things feel dull and monotonous. Work, kids, in-laws, and friends have taken over romance.

I get it, I have been with my partner for the past 16 years and it can feel stagnant.

But, this is also when things can turn south pretty quickly in a relationship………

According to the American Psychological Association, conversations are essential to our wellbeing.

Fret not, I came up with 186 questions that are thought-provoking and designed for you to not just get to know your partner again but to build a foundation for the future ahead.

So, let’s read on!

Disclaimer:

Some of the links on here are affiliate links and I may earn if you click on them, AT NO EXTRA cost to you. Hope you find the information here useful! Thanks.

186 Questions To Reconnect With Your Partner

1. How can I love you today?

2. What is my best physical asset? (no need to be shy, take this opportunity to flirt with your partner)

3. What makes you feel alive?

4. Why do you choose to come home to me immediately after work?

Questions To Reconnect With Your Partner

5. What are you most proud of?

6. Is there a past regret that is haunting you?

7. What book shaped you?

8. What are your goals for yourself in the next year, 5 years, 10 years?

9. What is the nicest thing you have ever done for someone?

10. What is the kindest thought/ gesture someone has ever done for you?

11. What is a family tradition that you want to implement in our (future) family one day?

12. What is a good childhood memory of yours?

13. Who are you closest to in your family? Why?

14. What role does faith/ religion play in your life?

15. Are you satisfied with your life?

16. Describe your ideal vacation.

17. What do you think is the hardest issue we have to face?

18. Do I make it easy to talk to you about those hard issues?

19. How would your friends describe you?

20. How would you describe me?

21. What are you currently working on outside work? How can I be of service?

22. When we reach the end of our lives, what is the last thing you want to say to me?

23. If we weren’t together, what advice would you give me on dating?

24. How did the pandemic affect you?

25. If money was no object, what would you be doing?

26. What is your favorite trait of mine?

27. What is your favorite meal?

28. How have you been as a partner in this relationship? Rate on a scale of 1 to 10

29. How would you describe your relationship?

30. How many children do you want?

31. Would you want to be buried/ cremated?

32. What is your biggest worry in your life?

33. How will you be a better parent than your parents?

34. How have you changed since we met?

35. When was the last time you cried?

36. Why do you love me?

37. What are 3 values you hold dearly?

38. How do you handle having difficult conversations?

39. What chore do you hate the most?

40. What brings you the most pleasure in your sex life?

41. Describe what retirement looks like for you.

42. When do you feel most attractive?

43. What is one thing you would change about us?

44. What do you feel most appreciated for?

45. If you could change one thing about where we live, what would it be?

46. What teacher made the biggest impact on you?

47. What is one present you received which meant the most to you?

48. When was the last time you spoke about me? Why?

49. What is something you will never throw away?

50. What is the best advice you have ever received?

51. What does being a good friend look like?

52. How can I give you peace?

53. How would you like to be celebrated in your eulogy?

54. What is one question you are dying to ask me?

55. What are you afraid of? How can I help you?

56. What makes you depressed?

57. When do you think I look sexiest?

58. What is something expensive you think is worth paying for?

59. What is one thing you need to forgive yourself for?

60. If you could ask God one question, what would it be?

61. How can I boost your confidence?

62. When was the last time you were afraid to do something but did it anyway?

63. When was the last time you felt you experienced God?

64. What do you miss most about your childhood?

65. What would you tell your younger self?

66. What is a stressful event that you lived through?

67. How do you deal with stress?

68. When do you feel the least loved?

69. Do you think you have a purpose? What is it?

70. What is something you are scared to tell me?

71. Do you ask for help?

72. What was a dark period in your life?

73. What does it mean to have chemistry with someone?

74. Do you believe in soulmates?

75. What do you wish you were better at?

76. Who couldn’t you live living without?

77. Do you like yourself?

78. Is there someone you should apologize to?

79. Who has the most impact on you?

80. If you won the lottery today, how would you spend it?

81. Ten years from now, what would it look like?

82. If you could witness a historical event, what would it be?

83. What do you love the most about our pets/ children?

84. How much time would you like to spend with your family every week?

85. Do you trust people easily?

86. What activities help you relax?

87. What makes you feel insecure?

88. Do you find your career fulfilling?

89. What is your favorite podcast?

90. What is one thing that happened to you that made you smile?

91. What mistakes have you learned from your previous relationships?

92. Do you think we spend the right amount of time together?

93. How do you think you react when you fight with me?

94. What is your ideal timeline to move in together?

95. What is your proudest accomplishment in our relationship as a couple?

96. What do you think other people say about us?

97. When was the moment you knew I was the one?

98. What is your least favorite thing about our relationship?

99. What has been the biggest challenge in your relationship?

100. What do you remember thinking when you first met me?

101. When do you feel most connected with me?

102. What memory of ours makes you smile?

103. What is the best way to spend a rainy day?

104. What used to bother you in our relationship but has now since been accepted?

105. Tell me the end of a perfect work day.

106. Do you have a guilty pleasure?

107. What do you feel is missing in our lives?

108. How do you picture me 10 years from now?

109. Who in your life is the most stressful? Why?

110. What steps can I take to be more supportive of you?

111. What is one lesson you want to teach your future kids?

112. Do you believe we are soulmates?

113. How can we improve emotional intimacy?

114. How do you like to express affection?

115. How would you describe the feelings you have when you are home?

116. When was the last time you felt seen by me?

117. How do you feel about the way we manage finances together?

118. What do you need more of me in times of disagreement?

119. How do you deal with feeling distant from me?

120. What is your idea of a perfect date night?

121. What is a funny habit I have?

122. What is the most adventurous thing we have done together?

123. What song reminds you of us?

124. What is one thing you have always wanted to ask but never did?

125. How do you feel about how we handle relationship challenges with our in-laws?

126. What is your favorite memory of us with our friends?

127. What is your favorite memory of us with your family?

128. What is one thing you like about my family?

129. What is one thing you dislike about my family?

130. How do you feel about affection in public?

131. What makes you feel most desired by me

132. How can we keep the spark alive?

133. What is a hard lesson you learnt from a hard break-up?

134. What is a skill you wish you had?

135. Is there something in your life you will be changing in the next month/ year?

136. Who is your oldest friend and what do you love about them?

137. What did you learn about yourself since you met me?

138. What was your first impression of me?

139. What is something I do that always turns you on?

140. What boundaries do you have with your family and friends?

141. Are you happy with how we split our finances?

142. How often do you need ‘me – time’?

143. How do you feel about inviting guests over?

144. How will we know when it’s time to call quits in our relationship?

145. Which of your family/ friends is allowed to come over unannounced?

146. When do you feel most like yourself?

147. What is something you have learned from your siblings?

148. What was the first movie you watched?

149. What is something silly you believed as a kid?

150. What are 3 things on your bucket list?

151. If you were famous for one thing, what would it be?

152. What is a risk you want to take shortly?

153. How would you want to be remembered?

154. If we could live in any other country, which one would it be and why?

155. What is a book you have always wanted to read?

156. Describe your favorite way to unwind after a long day.

157. What is your favorite type of workout?

158. What is the best date we have ever had?

159. Which other couple do you admire the most?

160. How would you describe our relationship in one word?

161. What makes you feel like we are a team?

162. How do you feel about mornings vs nights?

163. What is a meal you can never get bored of?

164. What is one thing that instantly improves your mood?

165. What is a daily ritual at work you always do?

166. What is a childhood prank you remember?

167. What would it be about if we could create our reality show?

168. What is the most awkward situation you have been in?

169. What is one thing I do that always makes you laugh?

170. What is something you have never told anyone?

171. What is one thing you have had to let go of?

172. What do you admire about me?

173. How do you like to exercise?

174. How do you hope our kids remember us?

174. What is something your family did that you will want to avoid?

175. What makes our family special?

176. What do you do for self-care?

177. What is a health goal you want to achieve together?

178. How do you practice gratitude?

179. How do you approach healthy eating?

180. What would you be doing if you had one whole month off work?

181. If we could redo our proposal, how would you propose to me again?

182. What would be your ideal last meal together?

183. What would you do if you had to restart your career?

184. What was your favorite activity in school?

185. What is the weirdest thing you have ever eaten?

186. If you could be any animal, which one would you be?

How To Play

– Pick a day and time out of the week for a date night
– Get comfortable (your PJs, comfy pillows etc.)
– Select 20 questions
– Remind them of the “house rules” below

House Rules To Set The Scene

– Practice being present
– Create a safe space for them to share
– Look at your partner’s eyes as you both share and actively listen
– If necessary, repeat what they answered as a way of validating their feelings
– Be supportive
– Be open to hearing what they have to say IF you want an honest answer
– Avoid being defensive or shift blame
– Get distracted with useless/ background information
– Try to avoid using your mobile phone so that you don’t get distracted by notifications
– Ask any many clarifying questions as you can
– Do not pass judgment
– Do not laugh at their sharings (unless it is meant to be funny)
– Never assume you know the answer even if you have asked them prior because answers can change
– Have fun and let loose!

Conclusion

So there you have it folks, all 186 questions for couples to reconnect with your partner.

I hope these questions for couples to reconnect draw you closer than ever to a more strong and fulfilling relationship.

Whether you are looking to be on the same page as your partner or reignite the spark, these powerful questions are excellent tools towards understanding each other.

I suggest that you print this out or bookmark it using your mobile browser so you can easily use it as a reference.

So, what are you waiting for?

Start carving out time for each other and rekindle that oxytocin you once shared!

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