Wife Keeps Threatening Divorce – 10 IMMEDIATE Solutions (2024)

Your wife keeps threatening divorce?

I bet you are heartbroken but also feeling alone like that there is no end in sight to this problem.

You must also be wondering why she keeps doing this. Does she mean it when she says she wants to walk out forever?

You might be ashamed to talk to others about this and you might even start to blame yourself for the state your marriage is in.

Rest assured, you are not alone. This happens to a lot of couples. I will share some possibilities as to why this happens and what you can do about this nagging problem.

So hang on tight – it’s going to be one bumpy read indeed!

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Table Of Contents

Wife Keeps Threatening Divorce – 10 Reasons & Solutions

1. Little Impulse Control

Could she struggle with having control issues? The minute you both get into a heated argument, all she wants to do is to end things because she feels that is the only way for her to control things.

This could stem from her childhood where she may have witnessed how her parents behaved and it conditioned her into thinking that this is normal behavior in marriages.

2. Feeling Frustrated

Maybe using the big D word gets your attention. The rest of the time you might not even take her seriously.

I am not going to lie, I have used the word separation with my husband when things got very tense between us in the early years of our marriage. We were sleep-deprived and were dealing with a colicky baby. Tempers flared and I asked him to leave the house.

When we did reconcile, we did discuss temporary separation as we saw no end to the current problem we were facing.

3. Affair

Hold your breath for this one.

She might be having an affair. This dalliance she is experiencing with another man is probably making her feel like the marriage is over.

She might think the grass is 1000 times greener than the nightmare marriage she is living in. Perhaps her threats are not so empty after all as she might want you to take the first step and end the marriage.

4. She Wants Out

Wife keeps threatening divorce?

She might just be done with the relationship. This is hard to hear but she is probably reached the end of her rope and doesn’t see any chance of a reconciliation.

This is a bitter pill to swallow for you but it is something you may need to come to terms with.

5. Gain Leverage

Human nature is for us to want to ‘win’ any argument we have as a sign of power. She might think that using the threat of divorce is enough to cower you into submission. Again, this could be something that stems from her childhood.

You won’t truly understand this until you communicate how you feel every time she brings up divorce.

6. Anger Issues

Truth is, women are more susceptible to anger issues because of all the seen and unseen labor around the house and work. Not to mention, being hormonal is part of being a woman.

She could be struggling with real anger management issues and the easiest thing to do is to lash out at you and the children.

7. Narcissistic

Consider the possibility that you married a narcissist or she became one over the years. Narcissistic people only care about their selfish needs.

Other symptoms may present itself in the following ways:

Expect to be recognized as superior without showcasing any achievements
Constantly talk about themselves
Critical of others
Preoccupied with success, power, and brilliance
Take advantage of others to make themselves look good

8. Mask Their Fear

She would rather call out divorce than let you do it because she fears you leaving her first. The fear of abandonment paralyzes her so she would rather be the first to do it.

9. Suffers From Substance Abuse

Yes, more men indulge in substances than women but it doesn’t mean you can discount this possibility. Maybe she is full of rage and suffers from mood swings because she is struggling with addiction to alcohol, drugs, or prescription pills.

10. Mentally Unwell

Does your wife keeps threatening divorce?

Well, 20% of Americans are currently struggling with mental health. This number is what is reported, imagine the unreported cases.

She could be struggling with a whole host of mental issues ranging from bipolar disorder to postpartum issues to even schizophrenia.

She might not even know she struggles with this and you will need to get the help she needs TOGETHER.

Wife Keeps Threatening Divorce – 10 Tips

1. Take A Breather

When things are hot and heavy, don’t expect to solve it right there. Sometimes, some much-needed space between the both of you can provide more clarity. Remember that things can easily escalate to violence if you do not practice this.

Truth is, if you want to stay married, you need to accept the reality that you won’t always like each other as arguments will come and go.

2. Ask If It Is All In Your Head

How many threats is it? Could it be your overactive imagination that she wants to leave? Our mind is capable of playing tricks on us so you have to be mindful. This answer requires some deep reflection on your part.

3. Observe Her Situation

Is she undergoing a lot of stress at work or home? If so, what can you do to help alleviate the situation?

My husband and I used to fight quite a fair bit because I was frustrated that I couldn’t do anything for myself and had to be bogged down with the endless tasks around the house.

Now, he takes care of the kids every Saturday morning so I can go for a nice run around the park.

It doesn’t have to be such drastic steps – sometimes it is the little things that can help your wife out and make her feel valued.

4. Spend Quality Time Together

I noticed the number of arguments my husband and I had was in correlation to the quality time we got to spend together.

Less time together always led to more arguments.

I often felt unseen and underappreciated and needed my one true love to just be with me. It is hard to do this right now as we are in the season of raising a precocious toddler and a baby but it is something we have started to be intentional about.

We can’t afford to do date nights but we can have date lunches in a simple restaurant nearby. The monthly date is something we both treasure as time is so precious.

5. Reflect On Your Marriage

I am a strong believer in agency. Are you doing the best you can as a husband and father in support of your marriage? What can you do today to improve the health of your marriage?

It is not always on our ‘angry spouse’. Their anger could be a reflection of the marriage they don’t want to be in. So, take some accountability for the state of your marriage.

6. Engage In Therapy

Look, while this situation seems impossible, understand that this is what opportunities look like. Perhaps this could be a chance for you to both rebuild a new marriage.

You get to decide what good things you want to keep and what negative things you want to remove TOGETHER through the services of a neutral party.

7. Be Kind

We somehow show our best selves to others but keep the bad side of us for our spouses. Try to flip the switch.

She could be grappling with some personal issues and is struggling to even communicate what that might be with you. If you continue to be kind even when she is being difficult, she may just feel you are there for her and eventually she may open up.

8. Focus On Yourself

I bet your self-esteem must have taken a beating every time she threatens to divorce.

I would like you to now focus the attention on yourself. Practice some self-care. Hit the gym with your buddies, go for a round of golf. Do what makes your soul feel alive outside this marriage.

Once your self-love tank is full, you become a different person with a different perspective. Nothing she says will affect you so easily as you can view things not so personally.

9. Consider Ending Things

If there is no end in sight and you have tried your best to save the marriage, you might need to consider divorce. It is hard but it might be necessary for some relationships.

There is only so much you can do on your own. It always takes two to tango.

10. Contact An Attorney

If the threats do not seem to come to an end, I would suggest you speak to an attorney to understand what is at stake about the children and your finances.

The conversation might not be pretty but it is important you prepare yourself if things take a turn.

Conclusion

I hope you had an empowering read with some of the practical tips and strategies I shared above on the infamous topic of your wife keeps threatening divorce.

Truth is, every marriage will have its seasons of sheer frustration and resentment.

So keep at it with your spouse and know that you have given it your best and left no stones unturned in this relationship.

Share with me in the comments if any of the information provided here today resonated with you. I would love to hear from you!

Sending you love and light always!

Frequently Asked Questions On Your Wife Keeps Threatening Divorce

Is Emotional Abuse The Same As Psychological Abuse?

Yes, although psychological abuse has a stronger effect on a victim’s mental capacity. Emotional abuse affects what people feel but real psychological abuse affects how people think and process information.

If you suspect you may be abused, please get the necessary help from available resources such as the National Domestic Helpline.

What Are The Definitions Of Emotional Abuse?

Any type of abuse that involves the continual emotional mistreatment of a child is considered emotional abuse.

It can sometimes be considered psychological abuse. It involves scaring, humiliating, ignoring a child deliberately.

If nothing is done, it can leave a huge impact on someone and may even affect their relationships with people in the future.

How Does Emotional Abuse Change You?

You might have more difficulty identifying and trusting your own feelings, tend to self sabotage or you might question your more often.

There could also be shame associated with it. Emotional abuse can make you question your very existence such as your quirks, likes and dislikes or hopes for the future.

How Do Victims Of Emotional Abuse Behave?

Feelings of anxiety, shame, guilt, frequent crying, confusion, powerlessness, overcompliance, and more are feelings you may experience.

You might try to bargain with the abuser by staying in the relationship with the hope of changing their behavior. You will also often place blame on yourself although you are not at fault.

Why Do People Emotionally Abuse?

To maintain power and control over someone. Emotional abuse may follow other forms of abuse in due time such as sexual, financial or physical.

Do note that it doesn’t have to include other forms to be considered abuse. Each type has a significant and profound impact on the person being traumatised.

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