Why Does My Girlfriend Ignore Me – 25 SURPRISING Reasons Why

Why does my girlfriend ignore me, you ask?

Well, I bet you must be feeling so hurt and alone every time she does this.

It can be extremely frustrating to try to understand why she does this. You might also start to think that giving up on your relationship might be easier for both of you.

Hold on to that thought just yet! Let’s not make any hasty decisions that could impact your life.

I am here to expose you to some ideas on why this is happening in your relationship as well as share with you some helpful strategies that could shift your relationship around.

Let’s begin!

Disclaimer:

Some of the links on here are affiliate links and I may earn if you click on them, AT NO EXTRA cost to you. Hope you find the information here useful! Thanks.

Why Does My Girlfriend Ignore Me – 25 Reasons

1. A Lot On Her Plate

Are there new changes or milestones in her life? 

Maybe she is now taking care of an aging parent, maybe she received a promotion at work?

Maybe she is turning 30 soon and wants to keep busy with as many things as she can check off her bucket list.

The list of possibilities as to why she is ignoring you is endless.

Because she has a lot going on, why don’t you take the time to indulge her to show her you are the most thoughtful boyfriend?

2. She Might Find You Frustrating

Could she be feeling annoyed at you? Maybe she is ignoring you – hoping you get the idea and change for the better.

3. Values Personal Time

Women these days are more independent and can find so many things to entertain them. Maybe she has a busy social life or a great workout schedule at the gym.

She might appreciate the alone time to unwind so she can regroup for the rest of her day/ week. So you might think this is ignoring her but in fact, she could just be needing some time alone for herself.

4. Work Stress

When I was working in a management consulting firm, I pulled in easily 18 – 20 hour days. There were some days when I would go to the extent of sleeping in my office wear because of the exhaustion.

So the last thing on my mind back then was to reply to texts and calls from my significant other.

5. She Is Not Connected To You Emotionally

Don’t assume all women are in touch with their emotions. Some women might be detached from past childhood traumas. She might struggle to communicate with you her needs and this is why it’s easier to be distant from you.

Did you know that 4 attachment styles can be linked to how your needs were or were not met as a child?

Take the quiz here to understand you and your partner better!

I practise an avoidant style which means social interactions and bonds tend to be surface level and I tend to keep people even loved ones at a distance.

6. No Longer Interested

Oh boy, here’s a tough one for you to swallow.

Maybe, just maybe…she is done with the relationship. She is just waiting for you to end things instead of her having to deal with it.

They always say it’s easier to be the one who breaks another’s heart than to be the one who is dumped.

7. Tit For Tat

Why does my girlfriend ignore me, you ponder?

Could she be emotionally blackmailing you? Maybe she feels ignored and unheard by you.

Her solution is to ignore you in the hopes that you get and understand how she feels.

8. You Cheated

Women always know even if you think you did a good job of trying to hide it.

She might be choosing to ignore it – regretting ever finding out or she might be guilt-tripping you into admission.

9. You Are Too Clingy

This relates a lot to attachment styles. So, have you discovered yours yet?

Another way to look at it also how you like to receive love from other people. What is your love language? Unsure?

Take the love language test!

You might value quality time with her but she might not want that. It repels her.

10. She Is Cheating

Ignoring someone in your romantic relationship is a huge red flag. This could just mean she has eyes for someone else.

It is the start of the end, unfortunately. She might be knee-deep in a tumultuous affair which is why she can’t be bothered about you anymore.

11. She Is Receiving Mixed Signals From You

Still questioning why does my girlfriend ignore me?

Well, do you blow her hot and cold? Let’s be honest and take an insightful look into how you may be contributing to this behavior.

She might be confused about how to behave because you keep giving her mixed signals.

12. You Forgot An Important Occasion

Most women (including me!) love anniversaries, birthdays, and special occasions. Did you forget anything in particular that she values as special?

She might start to think that giving you the cold shoulder may knock you to your senses to realize that you forgot something.

13. She Is Going Through A Tough Time

Just because you have been together for so many years doesn’t mean you truly know her. There might be something troubling her that she might not readily share.

To this day, some very private and traumatic things happened to me as a child that I am not ready to disclose to my partner of 15 years.

It is just too debilitating. And every time the trigger happened, I shut off and ignored him for days on end.

Over time, he knows when to give me space to go through the emotions.

14. She Is Sick

This relates a little to the point above. Could she be suffering from poor mental health? Ignoring you is easier for her than hurling abuses or even being vulnerable.

15. She Feels Insecure

Do you constantly love on her and dote on her? Does she know what your goals together as a couple are? Marriage in 2 years, 5 kids by the farm?

No?

Well, if she doesn’t know what the plans are, she might be feeling insecure and might want to stay avoidant so that she doesn’t get hurt in the event you decide to pick up and leave.

16. She Is Facing Financial Issues

Another aspect of her own life that you might not have considered.

Dating is expensive and her having to pay her share for dates might be costing her wallet.

So another possible reason why you feel my ignoring you helps alleviate the financial pressure. She only chooses to go out on dates as and when she wants to.

17. Suffers From Substance Abuse

Is she struggling with substance abuse? It might pain her to talk to you about it and seek help. So keeping you out of the loop is a coping mechanism for her.

She doesn’t want to be accountable right now.

18. Her Hormones

It’s her period, silly! It’s easy to blame her for acting out but do you know that her hormones are way beyond her control?

Ask her for her details on when her period starts. There is no shame in it. She will be touched that you are concerned about her well-being.

One week before she bleeds, she will need lots of rest, hydration, and healthy food to keep her body going.

During this period, she might be susceptible to more mood fluctuations. She might just be crying to you one minute and then acting cold another.

Understand that this is normal and she is healthy!

19. She Is Conflicted

She enjoys your company and your love but is not sure if it might be enough to last a lifetime.

Her thoughts might include her reevaluating the relationship but she is scared to talk to you about it so ignoring you feels easier.

20. She Is Upset That You Haven’t Fully Committed

An unpopular reason why you may wonder why does my girlfriend ignore me.

Maybe she is expecting a formal proposal from you. She could have been hinting for a while and you have not picked up on it.

She might then be frustrated at you as a result.

This doesn’t mean I am asking you to quickly propose.

Marriage is a commitment made for life but maybe you should start having an open dialogue on your readiness or lack of readiness.

Don’t forget a relationship also includes someone else’s future.

21. You Are Being Insensitive

I had a huge argument with my then-boyfriend once when he didn’t defend me after a friend of his called me fat in public. I was mortified and devastated that he didn’t come to my rescue.

So, I blocked him for a whole week because I felt so hurt and dejected. How could he be so insensitive? How could not empathize with my weight struggles, I thought? Well, turns out he can.

He was just immature and didn’t try to understand me enough. After a long teary conversation, he came to his senses and apologized for not being sensitive to my needs.

22. She Feels Distant From You

This happens to every relationship when life gets in the way.

She might feel so tired of trying to tear down the walls that she feels it is easier to just let things cool off until the relationship meets its untimely death.

23. She Is Bored

Dating life is supposed to be fun and exciting. You have your youth in your blood but if you stay home in front of the TV and call it a date, I promise you she will be bored.

Any surprise now as to why she is ignoring you?

24. She Is Commitment Phobic

Due to her past trauma or inner child wounds, she might not want to fully commit. This is why she might be blowing you hot and cold as and when she wants you.

25. You Are Just A Temporary Filler

Painful reason but maybe you are just there out of convenience. She doesn’t want an actual relationship but enjoys the fun dating phases of going out to nice restaurants and fancy dates.

But doesn’t want to do the hard work of actually communicating the tough stuff and overcoming challenges together.

15 Tips What To Do When She Ignores You

1.    Decide If She Is The One

A lot of us date without intention in mind. We just want to have fun. And sure there is a time and place for it but when you have to start putting in effort, it might not be as fun anymore.

So, I am going to say this again, ask yourself if she is the one. If she is, you will know that you are going to have to put in more effort to woo her back.

2. Be Patient

Imagine if you had a personal issue you had to keep secret. You might feel so overwhelmed and the last thing you want is for your partner to hound you.

So give her space and time to do her own thing and respect her to know that she can come to you when she is ready.

3. Listen Well

We often listen to respond. When she is sharing with you how your actions/ something that happened affected her, how do you respond? With acceptance and empathy or with an accusatory tone.

Look, I am no saint either. I am still working on my listening skills with my current partner.

4. Avoid Getting Angry

Hard recommendation, I know!

When you have been ignored, the last thing you want is to be kind to the person but that is exactly what you must do. I know when my husband is calm and collected in fights, I admire him more.

Why? Because I want to be as emotionally stable as him. It shows me how mature he is and that is someone I can look up to in my marriage.

5. Assure Her

Whether she is insecure by nature or by recent events, providing her some much-needed assurance as her other half will only warm her heart.

She will then also realize how much you treasure her as a partner.

6. Provide Space

There will be times throughout the tenure of your relationship when you will require more space from each other to grow.

Give that to her and know that she will come back to you once she feels better.

7. Work On Yourself

Hey, all that time that she is ignoring you better be used for something productive, eh? I know, I know you keep wondering why does my girlfriend ignore me but what is the point of repeatedly asking yourself that?

Spend some time with self-care activities for yourself. Some ideas may include:

• – Sign up for a guitar class
• – Go for a hike with your best friends
• – Improve your physique by hitting the gym
• – Start journaling
• – Take up a cooking class

The list of self-care is endless so go on and get exploring!

8. Talk To A Trusted Friend

You might need to unload on a friend or two while she is ignoring you. Sometimes speaking to someone outside your circle can widen your perspective or give you a change of pace when things seem hard in your relationship.

9. Plan Activities That She Enjoys

Another possible solution to why does my girlfriend ignore me is to plan something she enjoys.

So my boyfriend used to ask me out to play a game of pool or to go for a swim and I used to say no.

Why? Because I am a Leo and I hate losing/ appearing weak. Sounds ludicrous right? My self-esteem was that poor.

As a result, he stopped asking me out after so many NOs. I felt sad and dejected but I have to admit, I did ask for this.

So, in the end, I decided to surprise him with activities he enjoys. Of course, he was thrilled and loved being around me even more.

10. Put Yourself In Her Shoes

What if it was you who was going through something challenging and needed some space? Wouldn’t you want her to be gracious enough to provide space and kindness?

Food for thought?

11. Get Intimate

Why does my girlfriend ignore me, you continue to ask?

Intimacy here doesn’t just refer to making love. You could schedule to have deep and meaningful conversations through conversation cards.

So put down your phone and get intimate mentally!

12. Seek Counselling

We often think counseling is reserved for marriages. This is a fallacy.

If you engage in counseling very early in your relationship, it demonstrates your willingness and maturity to want to seek growth.

I don’t know if anyone has ever told you this but growth comes after painful and hard experiences.

13. Sign Up For A Relationship Retreat

There are so many on offer these days that can help you remove the blocks in your relationship.

Some of it could just be the both of you dedicating a few hours to a session or an overnight retreat somewhere nice.

Sure, it can cost you a fair bit but think of it as an important investment for your relationship.

14. Ask Yourself If You Are Overthinking Things

Here’s a possible solution to why does my girlfriend ignore me!

Maybe you think she is ignoring you but she is treating you as normal. Your internal paranoia and insecurities might be preying on you so you want to watch out for that.

Or risk driving her away for good.

So, look within before assuming that the problem is her.

15. End Things

Look, she could be the right person but she is appearing at the wrong time or she could just not be the one.

If you are the only one pulling the weight in the relationship, then it is unfair on you and you will have to know where to draw boundaries.

Conclusion For Why Does My Girlfriend Ignore Me

There you have it folks, the most comprehensive guide on what to do the next time you ask why does my girlfriend ignore me.

This is a very common problem in relationships as there will be different seasons in your life where you require more or less attention and love from each other.

I sincerely hope you understand her reasons for feeling this way as well as practice some of the strategies and tools I shared.

Understand that even if you tried your level best, some relationships meet their timely demise.

Let me know if anything I said here resonates with you.

Sending you light and love as always!

FAQs On Why Does My Girlfriend Ignore Me

Can A Girl Love You And Still Ignore You?

She’s unsure of how to proceed in the relationship. She might be having strong feelings for you one day and another day feel completely overwhelmed.

She might also be ignoring you because she might want to sort out her own feelings and figure out what she wants to do in the relationship.

What If She Is Not Responding?

She may already have a romantic partner or she may have blocked you from her devices.

She might have used you temporarily to fill a void in her life and now that she is ready to move on, she just avoids you completely.

It is important for you to draw boundaries to protect your worth.

Why Is My Girlfriend Online But Not Texting Me?

She could be busy and preoccupied with her own life. Don’t take things so personally and give her the space she needs.

She will come to you when she is free and available. The more you control her time, the more she will withdraw from you and that could spell disaster for your relationship.

Should I Text Her Everyday?

Text her when it feels natural and reciprocated by her. If not, you will come off as obsessive and controlling. Avoid forcing conversations if you find her pulling back. People are busy and have things to do.

A romantic relationship shouldn’t be your whole life as you are more than that.

How Do You Know If You Really Love Your Girlfriend?

You’ll start to develop strong compassion for them and that is how you know you have truly fallen head over heels for them. The urge to constantly be around them is magnetic.

You find yourself constantly wanting to be know everything about them and their life. In return, they will also shower you with affection.

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