25 Christian Sex Tips That Every Couple MUST KNOW! (2024 Guide)

Let’s talk about some hot and steamy Christian sex tips! You often feel like it’s such a taboo topic but did you know sex is holy?

My husband and I were virgins when we got married so sex was off the cards for the longest time.

But when we got married, we were so lost about what to do, how to improve our lovemaking, and truly enjoy each other.

But, fret not – I am here to share with you 25 tips that have helped my husband and me from being clueless to now churning advice to our friends!

In this guide, you will know what it takes to have a biblical perspective on your intimacy.

Disclaimer:

Some of the links on here are affiliate links and I may earn if you click on them, AT NO EXTRA cost to you. Hope you find the information here useful! Thanks.

1. Treat Sex As If It’s Holy

During our premarital engagement session, I was shocked to hear my priest say sex is holy.

After all, I spent 10 whole years avoiding sex like it was the plague because it was deemed as a sin by the Church and the community.

And yes, while it is sinful to engage in it before marriage – it suddenly changes to holy once you become married.

But, why?

God is not inhumane. He wants us to have pleasure but along with it comes the responsibility to conceive life every time we give our spouse our best selves.

The Christian couple should participate often in sexual activity with a great sense of freedom, passion, and fulfillment.

It is the only activity that separates your relationship with your spouse from any other you may have.

So, if you are looking for more Christian sex tips, read on!

2. Pray For Your Marriage

Bet you weren’t expecting me to tell you to pray for your marriage when you think of Christian love-making tips.

Truth is, sex is just one element of your marriage – albeit an important one.

By praying for your marriage, you start to be grateful for all the things that are going right in your marriage.

That type of gratitude will make sure you and your partner are reminded of the good times together, which can serve as mood boosters for when you want to be intimate with your spouse.

Of course, you can also pray for the hardships that you are struggling with.

Growth often happens when you are challenged and praying together builds that unity that you and your spouse can handle everything that will come your way.

3. Don’t Compare Your Marriage

Comparison is a thief of joy. While some couples may boast of having sex every other night, for some the frequency may just be once a month.

Only you and your significant other can determine what that number is and be comfortable with it.

Also, if anything, I learned not to overshare too many details of my marriage with others.

People often pass off judgments thinking it will help you solve your marital problems.

Those voices can even increase the number of problems you may have in your marriage as it starts to build more confusion.

4. Practice Self-Care

For you to be giving and receiving pleasure, you need to be your best self. How can you if you are not nurturing yourself enough?

The term self-care is all the buzz these days but what does it truly mean?

Sure, we all have laundry and chores to complete amidst screaming kids.

So, it may be difficult for us to go for daily yoga sessions at the gym.

What are some quick and simple ways to get your self-care in today?

• – 10-minute walk indoors/ around the park
• – Sleep in on a weekend
• – Have a weekly bubble bath
• – Make a healthy and scrumptious meal for yourself
• – Unplug from social media for a weekend
• – Spend time reading a book you have been putting off

There are more ideas for self care to better yourself today!

5. Focus On Your Pleasure Just As Much

If you keep focusing on your partner’s pleasure, it might turn into something you resent. And that can’t be good. For the both of you.

Look, ideally, you want both to achieve the highest sense of pleasure but realistically this doesn’t always happen.

So why don’t you alleviate the pressure of pleasing another by focusing on what you enjoy instead in the bedroom?

Never know, your partner could be excited at the idea of ‘giving back to you instead.

Over time, as you both find it exciting to take turns, it will increase the overall frequency of lovemaking.

6. Understand Each Other’s Love Language

You and your partner come from different backgrounds and possess different personalities.

Even your likes and dislikes can be vastly different. Spend some time discovering each other’s love language by taking this simple quiz.

Now, once you are done. Ask yourself if you have responded to your significant other by giving them what they need.

If your answer is yes, that is amazing! Keep up the good work.

But, if your answer is no like the rest of us, don’t worry!

Now that you know what he/ she may respond to, try to implement simple action steps that will bring you closer as a couple.

For example, if your partner’s love language is physical touch. Give your spouse a warm hug before the both of you leave for work.

But if they like words of affirmation, spend some time crafting out simple words of appreciation that you can text them over the week.

Believe it or not, these little things matter – especially if it is done outside sex itself as your other half will feel truly seen by you.

And isn’t that, what we truly want? To be validated by our partners?

This is one of the most helpful Christian sex tips you can find!

7. Resolve Any Marital Issues

Think of it. If you are having issues in your marriage, how can you even possibly think of making love to your husband/ wife?

There is a tonne of resources now available for the both of you to work on your marriage.

Uncovering those issues will help to bring you both closer both emotionally as well as physically.

8. Know That You Are The Only Person In His/ Her Eyes

Do you know what a gift it is to be the only person in the world that your partner gets to enjoy daily?

What a privilege it must be!

The confidence I get from that is translated into the things I practice with my husband.

For example, my husband only opens up to me about his inner thoughts, so I try not to criticize/ belittle him when he speaks.

Because let’s face it, no one will want to have sex with someone who makes you any less.

9. Communicate Expectations

While I am glad to have you here reading these Christian sex tips with me, I hope you are also sharing these with your spouse.

Truth is, there is no one-size-fits-all all approach to having great sex.

This is why you need to constantly communicate with your partner about what you like, and dislike, as well as boundaries.

I understand it can take a little bit of vulnerability on your end as sex has always been so taboo.

Plus, Hollywood makes it sound like everything will be perfect from the get-go.

However numerous studies have shown that couples who are in constant communication have better and more satisfying sex lives.

10. Say “Why Not?” More Often

When your spouse asks you for a coffee date or even tries to pinch your behind, what is your usual response? One of excuses or disdain?

“Oh, there is a mountain of chores. Sorry, but I have to cook dinner tonight.”

Life will always be full of things to do but if you keep rejecting your partner’s suggestions, how will the both of you ever be able to build a strong marital union?

So, start by saying, why not more often?

After all, life is too short not to.

11. Learn Something New Together

Get your mental head space going as a couple!

There are so many hobbies/ new activities you can pursue together as a couple such as getting sweaty at yoga class, signing up for a cooking class, or trying swing dancing.

Taking up a new hobby not only improves your physical and mental well-being but it can renew your zest for life. That will certainly translate very well into the bedroom.

12. Give Your Bodies A Break

This is one of the great sex tips for Christians. Sexuality is not just in your body but also in your mind.

Take a break from trying too hard and just enjoy your partner for who they are. Sounds counterintuitive but it puts less pressure on both parties.

When you both feel more relaxed, you are bound to reach for each other, willingly.

13. Get Spicy

Married Christian sex never has to be boring especially if you stayed a virgin before the wedding.

There are lots of positions, atmospheres, attires, and even locations for you and your spouse to consider.

I don’t have to get into the explicit details for you to guess which one suits you best.

As I said, communicate with your partner and find out what an adventurous sex life means to them!

14. Surprise One Another

It is easy to forget surprising your partner from time to time because well, they are always there anyway. But taking them for granted doesn’t help build your connection.

After figuring out, what their love language is, work on a surprise for them. Here are some simple ideas for you to consider:

• – whisk them away to a staycation over the weekend
• – subscribe to a food delivery service so that your spouse can have more time on their hands
• – book a spa date for just your partner so they can relax and unwind
• – email them a love letter telling them how much you appreciate them
• – pick them up for a lunch date

15. Hold Hands

Seems so basic, right?

But when you have a screaming baby and a toddler who is throwing tantrums, it is easy to forget the importance of building a bond with your significant other.

I know my husband tries to build these connections throughout the day and to be honest, I don’t always reciprocate because I am exhausted and cranky at the end of the day.

I have since learned to hold hands as we catch up on our day at the end of every night.

Sometimes, love is intentional.

16. Send A Dirty Text

Give your partner something to look forward to during a busy day at work. Of course, be smart about it.

Make sure you don’t text the wrong person or send a picture that can be damning. But a cheeky message here and there will surely make your partner’s heart race a bit more!

17. Be Flirtatious Throughout The Day

“Hey there, good-looking! 😉

When you were dating, it was so easy to be flirtatious as you constantly wanted to impress your partner.

Now, it feels like hard work to be seductive. But if you want your marriage and sex life to go the distance, you have to intentionally put in the work.

Perhaps it’s an extra-long kiss before they head for work or maybe it is you teasing them about a surprise at night. Do what works for you and enjoy reaping its benefits!

18. Have More Date Nights (But Without The Sex)

Christian sex tips shouldn’t just include sex but romance!

Having nights out without sex puts so much pressure away from intercourse. You will be encouraged to communicate and as a result, may just experience fewer conflicts.

The time spent can even help build the foundation to weather the sleepless nights you may have as a young parents. A date night serves as a mini-vacation and can rejuvenate your relationship.

A quick tip: Avoid talking about the kids, chores, and finances during the date. These will surely put a damper on intimate dates.

19. Compliment Your Partner

Being nice in a relationship is extremely underrated.

When was the last time you complimented your partner? It is somehow easier to be nice to other people than to our spouses. Why is that?

We take for granted their presence. But try passing them a nice compliment just because. Don’t do it because they took out the garbage or washed the dishes.

But give them a genuine compliment like “You look amazing today, honey!” And see how their face lights up!

20. Make A Playlist

What does music got to do with Christian sex tips, you ask?

Well, music always sets the mood for great sex. And guess what, you don’t even have to make a playlist by yourself anymore.

Just head on to Spotify and type out ‘romantic songs’ or even ‘music for sex’ in the search bar and you are good to go!

21. Plan A Private Getaway

I bet I know what you are thinking straight away. Where am I going to dump the three kids while I drink some margaritas by the beach?

For sure, this act is HARD. Requires a whole lot of planning and trustworthy help around you. But it’s also why it’s important to take the time to do it 1 – 2 times a year.

Both you and your husband have been shouldering all the responsibilities daily. And now that you wish to outsource help, you realize how much both of you have been doing.

This is exactly why a short getaway to fill your cups is so important to maintaining that attraction for your partner.

22. Exercise Together

Sweating can be such a chore especially if you both lead busy lives.

But you know exercising can increase your stamina both on the track as well as in the bedroom.

This will make for some even hotter and steamier nights together as you will have more endorphins!

So sign up for a new workout class together and watch those hormones come flooding in!

23. Spoon Or Cuddle More After Sex

While sex is amazing, a lot of people look for the post-sex for the amazing connection it brings.

So instead of rushing off right after intercourse, try to spend 20 – 30 minutes engaging with your partner.

It doesn’t have to be on the sex itself but more on how they have been feeling that day etc.

24. Take A Break – From Each Other!

Still looking for Christian married sex tips?

Spend some time apart from your partner. Encourage them to pursue their hobbies/ go out with their friends.

Essentially what I am saying is give them a chance to miss YOU.

If you are around them all the time, how will they appreciate wanting to be with you?

25. Sex Is Important, But Not Everything

I know you are expecting more Christian sex tips but understand that making love is integral but so is intimacy.

There are a lot of couples I know who don’t have sex, especially in their golden years but still enjoy each other’s company.

It is an important reminder to focus on the quality of your relationship rather than the frequency of the activity itself.

Conclusion For Christian Sex Tips

After reading this article, I hope these Christian marriage intimacy ideas can help boost your relationship with your significant other.

The adage that marriage is hard work is true. But don’t worry, I assure you it can also be very fulfilling and everlasting.

The most crucial part of building intimacy is to never give up on your spouse and continue loving them as they are.

So, let me know in the comments if any of the tips have worked for you – or maybe share something that you found useful in your relationship!

Frequently Asked Questions On Christian Sex Tips

How Can A Christian Have Better Sex?

Focus on how you are kind and thoughtful to your husband or wife outside the bedroom. This will only help to boost your partner’s mood.

It is your god given spouse so you have every right to let your mind wander into some fun, steamy locations where you may want to be intimate.

What Are The Christian Ideas On Sex?

God designed sex as an expression of love for both men and women to enjoy, for pleasure. It should not be seen as a duty or a moral obligation.  

God has an ideal that sex should be abstained prior to marriage and you should remain faithful to your partner throughout your marriage.

What Is The Best Sex Position For A Christian Couple?

The most holy sex position is considered to be the missionary position since it involves the man being on top.

The man is seen as the head of the household and the woman being submissive in nature is exactly how God intended it to be in a holy marriage and for eternity.

Does God Forgive Sex Before Marriage?

Yes, he offers his unending forgiveness and grace for all we have done or will do that is counter to his will. This includes pre marital sex.

However, God does want us to atone for our sins and honor him all the days of our lives as we repent our ways.

How Can I Enjoy Sex In My Marriage?

Take the lead in your marriage by initiating sex. 

Talk to your spouse about what feels good for him and what feels good for you. Be kind and respectful outside the bedroom to increase desire in each other.

Intimacy is very important and sacred in a marriage and designed to be pleasurable for each spouse.

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