Why Is My Husband Mean To Me In My Dreams – 13 Shocking Reasons

Why is my husband mean to me in my dreams?

It sounds like such a bizarre thought but I bet you are wondering if having this thought indicates a more significant issue in your marriage.

Does this mean he wants to leave me? Is he having someone else on the side? Are we doomed? Am I to be blamed?

It can feel overwhelming and confusing all at once. However, rest assured that I will journey alongside you to discover why am I having weird dreams and what to do about it.

So, let’s read on to help you get on track with your marriage!

Disclaimer:

Some of the links on here are affiliate links and I may earn if you click on them, AT NO EXTRA cost to you. Hope you find the information here useful! Thanks.

1. You Have Insecurities About Your Relationship

Are there any underlying issues about your marriage? Our dreams are usually projecting some subconscious thoughts/ problems we are facing in our day to day.

Feeling insecure about your spouse can be addicting especially if you entertain those thoughts regularly. Insecurities usually come up when you are faced with triggers.

Have you seen him get close to a female colleague at work? Did you see him texting his ex?

These are just some of the instances where you mind starts planting seeds of doubt in your relationship.

2. You Don’t Feel Satisfied In Your Relationship

yourself whether your eyes light up when your partner comes home.

Yes, the realities of life with kids, mortgages and interference with in laws may get in the way of intimacy and communication but you have to start prioritizing this in your life.

3. You Want To Leave The Relationship

Are you putting negative thoughts in your head that he is mean, but you want to leave the relationship?

Listen, while I preach about how fantastic marriage is, it’s also much work for TWO parties. You may feel subconsciously that you are exhausted from having to do it all and you are at the end of your rope.

4. He Is Just As Mean In Real Life

Another reason to wonder why is my husband mean to me in my dreams is whether he is just as abusive to you in real life?

Abuse can come in many forms, including physical, mental, and emotional.

Here are a few signs of abuse:

• – Gaslighting – he undermines your experience and emotions when you tell him he is hurting you
• – Love bombing – he showers you affectionately after being abusive. This confuses you as you experience both the highs and the lows in a few minutes/ hours.
• – Isolates you from your loved ones
• – Power dynamics – he expects you to be submissive and wants to be the authority figure in your home
• – Physical violence
• – Demeaning statements
• – Yelling or raising his voice to intimidate or cause fear

If you are experiencing this, please do not hesitate to get help.

Always remember that there are NO excuses for this type of behavior!

5. You Experienced Past Trauma

Do you ever ask yourself why I am having weird dreams?

Well, did you grow up in an angry household? Were you witness to many fights between your parents as a young child?

Could you be projecting your parents in your current relationship? For fear, it can happen to you?

Trauma is there to prevent you from experiencing the same type of pain and heartache, so maybe this is why your brain is going into overdrive, and you imagine thing that hasn’t happened yet.

6. You Are Experiencing Anxiety

Anxiety doesn’t just come from everyday life stressors but can be medical conditions such as heart disease, diabetes, asthma, and thyroid conditions.

Some symptoms include feeling nervous, having a sense of gloom and doom, hyperventilating, trembling, or even having bad dreams at night!

7. Your Family Life Is Experiencing A Lot Of New Changes

Have there been any significant events? Did you move halfway across the country? Did someone in the family pass?

Your mind might have strange coping mechanisms, even if it means showing up as your husband being mean to me in your dreams.

8. He Is Generally Narcissistic

Perhaps your husband is generally exhibiting poor behavior, such as narcissism. This could stem from many reasons, such as surroundings, childhood trauma, or neurobiology.

Remember that people who show signs of narcissism can often be charming and charismatic but often hold a dark side to things. Perhaps this is your subconscious trying to warn you of impending/ current danger.

9. You Suspect He Is Cheating

Why did I dream my husband cheated on me?

Have you been feeling uneasy lately? Do you know where his whereabouts are at all times? Maybe he is cheating in real life.

In a study titled America’s Generation Gap in Extramarital Affairs, 20% of couples said they had cheated during their marriage.

Look out for these 11 common signs of cheating:

• – Changes in your sex life
• – Indifference
• – Interest in changing up appearances
• – Lying
• – Attitude changes
• – Avoidance
• – Money problems
• – Addicted to his phone/ Doesn’t allow you to check his phone

*Please note that this list is not exhausting

10. He Is Depressed In Real Life

Could he be mean to you in your dreams, a sign that he is depressed?

Sounds like a bit of a stretch? Well, hear me out. Depressed people are known to exhibit symptoms where they might be mean to others.

11. He Is Facing Substance Abuse Issues In Real Life

Is he out of character in your dreams because he is addicted to drugs or alcohol? If a solution is not found soon, he might act out to you in real life.

12. You Feel He Doesn’t Love You Anymore

I bet you are wondering why I do I dream about him.

Well, desire can go up and down in marriage, especially in the long term. Maybe his being mean to you is a sign that you feel unworthy or undesired.

But it’s not all on him. Ask yourself, are you doing enough to keep the romance alive?

Consider some of the tips below to help rekindle the spark:

• – Take lovemaking off the table
• – Focus on appreciation for the everyday things
• – Forgive all resentments
• – Revisit the past (perhaps have ice cream at the park where you met)
• – Be kind and interested as well as interesting to your partner

13. You Are Sleep Deprived

“I had a dream about him and it didn’t end well.”

Well, sleep deprivation can make you think all sorts of crazy thoughts. I would know that I am currently with a newborn baby and a toddler who doesn’t sleep. I feel more emotional and susceptible to crazy thoughts when I don’t sleep.

So, this is a good reason why you might think your husband is mean to you in your dreams!

How To Stop Having Bad Dreams About Your Partner?

1. Communicate

The longer you have been married, the more you take communication for granted. Why? Because you only talk when discussing chores, school runs, who does the cooking.

What happened to ask your partner how their day went?

Communication is not only verbal but also in your body language. How do you greet your partner at the door when they return home? Are you excited?

Despite being with my husband after 15 years, my heart still skips a beat when I hear his car pulling into the driveway.

*cue romantic movie*

2. Spend More Time Together

Quality over quantity here. Whenever I am out, I see most couples busy taking selfies to post on social media rather than engaging in healthy conversation or even holding hands.

Remember never to underestimate the power of togetherness in building intimacy.

3. Stay Interested

How many of us are still interested in our partner? Getting caught up in the day-to-day is easy, but feigning indifference starts resentment in your marriage.

Your mind then wanders into other negative thoughts such as why is my husband mean to me in my dreams.

4. Listen

There is this saying that we have two ears and one mouth, yet we need to improve our listening skills.

Whether about work or the most mundane thing, every sentence our spouse says should be treated with care and respect.

Sometimes, we might need to show them how it is done before it gets reciprocated. Hang in there; I know how it feels.

5. Show Enthusiasm

We often give our best selves to everyone else but keep the balance, if any, to our partners. How do you think it would make them feel? Nothing special, am I right?

So try to exhibit some form of enthusiasm with your partner, whether it be giggling like a schoolgirl when they make a joke or holding their hand with some much-needed warmth.

Frequently Asked Questions

What Does It Mean When Your Partner Is Mean To You In Your Dreams?

The anger in the dream is your anger; it’s coming from you because this is your creation.

According to Lauri Loewenberg, a professional dream expert, it is a good rule of thumb to look at yourself and examine your feelings first.

We often manifest our deepest insecurities in the form of a dream.

Why Am I Having Bad Dreams About My Husband?

You are worried or insecure about the relationship when you start having bad dreams about your husband.

Discussing the contents of your dream and emotions can be a valuable tool to work through any issues or problems in your relationship together.

Unfortunately, having a negative dream about your partner does affect how you may relate to your partner the next day.

Do Dreams Mean Anything In A Relationship?

Your dreams can serve as a metaphor for the goings on in your life and even give you insight into your true feelings about the relationship.

The subconscious mind may be revealing our inner suppressed thoughts and emotions, according to some researchers. If used correctly, it can help us navigate our lives for the better.

Can Dreams Predict The Future?

No, little scientific evidence suggests that dreams are a preview of the future. Some research may suggest that specific dreams may help predict the onset of illness and mental decline.

For example, people with Parkinson’s disease or similar diseases may experience negative emotions indicative of future cognitive decline.

Do Dreams Indicate Good Sleep?

It either reflects or contributes to healthy sleep, according to researchers. 

However, growing evidence suggests that dreaming plays a role in supportive brain functions while awake, such as processing thoughts, memories, and emotions.

If you rarely dream, this may be a sign of sleep deprivation.

Conclusion

So there you have it, folks, some valuable tips and strategies to help when you ask why is my husband mean to me in my dreams.

Surely it can’t be easy to feel this way, and you may occasionally feel puzzled.

However, rest assured that only you can control your actions and emotions, and with the right strategy, you can overcome these complex thoughts and dreams.

Let me know in the comments below if any of my solutions have personally worked for you.

Or you may have other topics/ questions you’d like to see on the blog that could benefit the marriage community.

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